Pages

Thursday, October 15, 2009

the bond i share with the five ruppee note


I AM THE older of two sisters and we’re a small family of four. A small family is a happy family indeed. But once upon a time, there were five people in our family. I had a younger brother, Ashish, who was four years younger than me. He was very different from me. He was crazy about cricket. He was more into sports than studies. He loved black and I loved white, and that was how different we were. When it came to books, he hated them. It was very easy to make him fall asleep; all I had to do was to just keep a school book in front of him. He would always end up being scolded by our parents. But I would proudly say that he was a great cricket player. If one asked my friends about their favourite cricket players, their answer will be either Sachin or Yuvraj or Brett Lee or some big name but, as for me, my brother is my favourite.
As I sit here on the bench in our garden, looking at beautiful fruits and flowers dancing with the breeze, I wonder if the mesmerised onlooker will ever imagine that this is where our family’s dark moments lie. Deep down, under the roots of the plants growing here. I always spend my evenings here thinking about my brother and how his soul blossoms and dances with the flowers and the plants.
It happened five years ago. He was 10 at that time and I was 14. He would usually go out with the other kids to play cricket in the evenings. But on that warm, sunny December evening, the other kids didn’t take him along. The previous day, his team had lost the game and he had lost his pocket money as well – the losing team had to buy snacks for the winners. Mom and dad were busy that day, so the two of us had lunch together, not realising that it would be our last meal together. I can’t remember him speaking much that day, all I remember is that he asked me for a five rupee note for the next day’s game, which I promised I would lend him. After that, he went outside to practice – playing cricket all alone in the playground near our house pond.

Hours later, dad asked for him but he was nowhere to be seen. Mom and dad started searching for him – the playgrounds, play stations, neighbours’ houses, everywhere they could possibly think he’d go. My younger sister and I tried looking for him at all his frequent hangouts but it was all in vain. Our search caught the neighbourhood’s attention and it gained momentum, lasting for hours. Back at home, mom told everyone that she could see a cricket ball floating in the pond. She was already in tears. Everyone gathered around her, scolding her for thinking such things but agreed to search the pond to convince her that her fear was baseless. One of our neighbours went into the pond. “There is something, I think it’s a body.” The minute she heard it, mom fell down, unconscious. Uncle brought out Ashish. He was already dead. They tried everything, all possible aids to bring him back. I was so confused, tears streamed down my cold face. I didn’t know what was going on, all I knew was that I wouldn’t be seeing my brother anymore. I saw papa cry for the first time that day.
They dressed Ashish up for the funeral. He was looking lovely – smart in his school uniform.
I don’t know how cold he must have felt inside the water in that chilling pond that day in December. Did he die right after falling down there? Did he long for someone to come out of the house and find him? Why didn’t we see that cricket ball at first?
We could have found him earlier and maybe we could have saved him. These are questions which will haunt me and my family forever, questions for which we have no answers. But I’m sure the Almighty will have the answers. Now, all we can do is pray for his soul to rest in peace
Today, again, I sit here in the garden which was a pond five years ago, the pond that took my brother. I have a five rupee note in my pocket that I will give him one day for sure.


12 comments:

Lenin said...

so sorry to hear ur story, even though i knew it from b4, its so heartbreaking, my eyes are wet..he was a good kid, i knew him..i knw how u must have felt. feels like end of the world.. but lets not lose hope..may b god had better plans for him..he must be happy there...cos his pretty sister is happy...

James said...

dnt cry dear!!!u knw hez playing cricket wid god himself..n hez batting it seems k.hez wid god!!!

bidyalakshmi said...

y r u disheartened dear.......my younger bro is lso ur bro too....n i still remembr wat u hd said"ei ngasi enaopa ama fangge"on dat day!!!!dis is a part of lyf.....u hv 2 face it wit a smile....its nt d end of d world...u hv miles 2 go....so b bold!!!

lai said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
An@cHr0noX said...

Buddy I dint kno bout dis... Im really sorry bout ur bro... WATER and CURRENT is the most dangerous for Children. This epitaph remains of an incident of our LOCALITY child who was drown to death while catching DRAGONFLY... I took him at RIMS in my CAR and then Emergency Room and there in front of my eyes THE SMALL BOY LIE IN THE BED no breathing..QUITE DEAD. At dat moment I only think of one thing IF ONLY I WERE SOME KIND OF HEALER I wudnt have let him die like dat... I kno wat U r feeling rite now coz even he was not my own brother I felt the LOST too deeply till now... LIFE IS UNFAIR but WE GOTTA LIVE THE LIFE... and dats wat we called a "JOURNEY OF LIFE"... Buddy Cheer Up!! Let it GO...

lai said...

when i read it for d 1st time, i felt like i kno him and i cud see those scene in front of my eyes...if i say i understand ur feelings den i mg8 be wrong but still after going through wat u hav written, i can imagine how much pain n sorrow u and ur family must be hiding in ur hearts..but u sud b strong enough 2 support ur parents n make dem happy..now u r ur parent's daughter as well as son..u r also sister n brother of ur little sis..you hav many roles 2 play and many things 2 do so don't look back keep goin:)

lastain said...

Life is full with untold mysteries. But, mysteries... all of them have untold reasons to be mysterious. I can only imagine...and I know I can't reach the depth of pain that must have been with you. But, as a brother.... I'll try all my best to protect you. Keep the memories with you coz... they are so special... but we have to move on, and hope for a better tomorrow.

sidish6 said...

hi, i read this article on a mag, "Tehelka" i think. Well i shed tears readin it. . . . i'm sorry for the loses :( keep writing, he'd like that. . . . . Tc

Anupriya said...

ya it was published in tehelka.....thnx for the support

clandestine said...

It reminds me of a similar incident, something very close to heart. My sister died at 4. She got drown in the pond. That day when i came back from school i found many people being gathered at my home, neighbors, relatives... I was clueless and i was wondering "what's going on?" at that time. And my mom cried her heart out that day... This is the only thing i remember coz i was also too young then, i was 6. I don't have much sweet memories to cherished her, not even a handful, yet she is still in my heart and as such she was my only little sister i find her name the sweetest on earth. Everyone used to called her "Abe-sana" with love.

And hai Anu.. don't lose heart.. they are God's favorite child.

Keisham Deepak said...

I feel vry emotional....ntohng hve to say but this is we called LIFE....makes me to cry

Yambem RoshniKumar said...

I felt the tears on my cheek when I read your story.....May the GOD bless you ALL.

Post a Comment